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I thought were were on the same track. I told my husband of specific things that i would not like ie. reading or looking at porn in front of me. He said he wouldn't yet he stole my visa and bought some when i was out of the house. I clarified that i would like him not to watch porn. He acknowledged my feeling and then called the satellite dish company and order the "hustler package". Yet there's no sex in the marriage because he has a problem getting it up. My suggestion was to go to counselling or the doctor and reduce the stress in his life. So he quit his job and now i'm supporting him totally. I've asked for help around the house ie. feed the dog, cut the grass. He's done both but poorly-front lawn is done, back yard isn't and side yard isn't. Am i being too demanding. are my expectations to high? I would like respect, and honoured. Yes he has no problem going fishing and is now planning a trip civic weekend, of course, without us.

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Midlife Crisis?? This is what it seems to me he is having. Either you, past employer(s) or something happened that has dramatically changed his outlook on everything. He needs help.

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Get a divorce. I got depressed just reading the question.
you have to get him that help. do it now
Sounds like you married a bum :(

Counseling might help. Moving to a different city might help.
I agree that you need to go for the counseling and see if you can get back on the same page.
sounds like his priority's are all out of wack.

I'd let him know that you will not support his

porn, and if you are the only one working he

needs to get a job! and if he wants to stay married

see a Dr for the help he needs. or get out. you deserve

respect. and self respect.
He is taking advantage of you. Tell him to get some viagra and stop STEALING your credit card!
How is he funding this trip? I would tell him that if he doesn't get help then you are going to leave. You should not be disrespected like you are. Schedule a meeting with a counselor and if he refuse to go cut him off financially, if that doesn't work just go. Maybe this is his way of letting you know that he's just not interested in working on the marriage. Sorry. Good luck.
Does he have a drug or alcohol problem? Could you recognize a drug problem if you were not aware of what to look for?

It sounds to me as if there is a problem with sex because he has true intimacy issues. This comes from the deep-rooted fear of exposing or opening up to your partner completely--physically and emotionally. This is so common these days. It believing that by allowing yourself to be vulnerable to another person you will only be hurt or rejected in the most devestating and personal way. To truly exchange love, both people must be willing to take that risk, it is hard to let all the built in defense mechanisms come down (after many generations of dysfunction in families). Try and reassure him with love, but ultimately you must realize if he really wants to get better--or just make excuses.